Why Your First Ride in Amsterdam Will Probably Be Your Last and How to Stay Alive

If you're in Amsterdam, then riding a bike isn't just about transportation. It’s like having a connection to your nervous system and instincts. Unlike your regular postcard ride along the canals of the 17th century, the real cycling experience is fast-paced, dynamic and challenging. There are more bicycles than people in the city, and it's like living by the rhythm of a "way of life" that seems more like swimming with sharks than relaxing. For a local person, the cycle path is like the holy grail; for you, as a newbie, it's more like the gauntlet where the first thing you'll learn how to do is to keep balance.

The Secret of "Ugly" Bike Trick

One of the ironies of Amsterdam is that despite being famous for perfect designs and aesthetic appearance, the most intelligent solution for a beginner is to ride a bike looking like a trash-bin on wheels. The Dutch capital is the champion among all cities in terms of bike thefts – there are more than 50,000 bicycles stolen annually. As a result, the locals mastered the trick of "ugly bike".

They customize their rides with some special and bright decorations or unusual personal touches that will make their bike less attractive for a professional bike-theft. While choosing a bike, if you're renting one, you shouldn't pay much attention to its appearance. You should take the bike that looks the most special or rusty.

However, in order to ensure your safety, you should apply a two-lock technique – lock the back wheel and fix it with the help of the heavy chain to a fixed object.

"People will 'customize' their bicycles for practical reasons and also to make them less desirable to steal." — Locking Your Bike In Amsterdam

Shark Teeth and the Rule of Right Hand

In order to move around Amsterdam, you have to know the secret language written in asphalt. However, one of the most important "characters" to recognize is haaientanden (shark teeth) – white triangular marking on the road. If these triangles are facing you, you should give the way to all moving objects on the road.

However, even more surprising for beginners is the "Right-Hand Rule" in case of "Equal Intersections". These intersections do not have any traffic lights or priority signs, so every approaching car, truck or bike from your right has the absolute right of way. In other countries a cyclist would expect a car to stop, but in Amsterdam a car from the right expects you to stop and will proceed according to his expectations.

Tram Lines Trap (90° Angle Requirement)

The tram lines of Amsterdam are the great invention of the city infrastructure, however, they can become deathly traps for bicycle tires. They are designed in such a way as to catch a bike wheel and throw it off the rail with a deafening crash. In order to stay alive, you should always pass these rails perpendicularly – ideally at 90° angle.

Even the most experienced riders were humbled by these rails. Tip for beginners: if you're afraid, you can practice crossing the imaginary line at 90° angle at some quiet side street and then you can go to the center of the city.

"My bike tire caught on a tram line and I was thrown into traffic with speeding cars and bikes whizzing by… It happened to the best." — Badass Tours

The City Can "Steal" Your Bike Before the Thieves Get to It

Not finding your bike in the parking place doesn't necessarily mean that it was stolen. If you park in a "cycle-free" area such as Dam Square, Leidseplein, or the hectic perimeter near Central Station, then the first to remove it would be the authorities. Stolen bikes are delivered to the Fietsdepot (Bike Depot), and then you have to go outside of the city in order to pay the obligatory fine to get it.

If you lose your bike, there are three steps you have to make in order to find it:

1. Check the Fietsdepot: Call the authorities at 020-334-4522 or check the depot's online database in order to check whether your bike was removed.

2. Call the Police: If your bike wasn't found in the depot, then you have to call the non-emergency police number at 0900-8844 to make sure that it wasn a standard removal.

3. File the Report: If it was stolen, you should file the official report at www.politie.nl/aangifte.

Why You Shouldn't "Do as the Locals Do"

The worst advice you can get in the city is "follow the locals". Dutch people have unique kinesthetic abilities that they start developing when they are babies – kids are taught to ride on a trainer bike earlier than they start walking. When they grow up, they acquire this ability to the level of instinct, so they can ride in dense groups and predict the changes in movement.

Locals may ignore red traffic lights or cross pedestrian zone, but as a beginner you are a guest in the dancing ballet. Since July 1, 2019 there is a strict ban on using the mobile phone while cycling (€95 fine). Moreover, you have to be aware of the "blind spot" of big lorries and trucks; don't wait next to them at the light because they won't see you turning. Follow the "instinct gap" and be predictable: always stop at red lights, make clear hand gestures and stay in your lane.

Conclusion: The Paced Survival

Cycling in Amsterdam is an amazing experience – as long as you obey the rules of the game. It is a fast paced environment where the cycle path is sacred land shared with scooters, taxis and aggressive trams. The fact that you are a tourist in the city doesn't mean that you're immune to physical laws or Dutch police.

Before you raise your kickstand, try asking yourself: are you ready to change your slow route mentality into the fast paced one?